whats your funniest joke?

One day in the forest, 3 guys were just hiking along a trail when all of a sudden, a huge pack of indians attaked them and knocked them out. When they woke up, they were at the leader of the tribe’s throne. The chief then said “All of your lives may be spared if you […]

Written on Sunday, July 20th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

One day in the forest, 3 guys were just hiking along a trail when all of a sudden, a huge pack of indians attaked them and knocked them out.

When they woke up, they were at the leader of the tribe’s throne.

The chief then said “All of your lives may be spared if you can find ten of one fruit and bring them back to me.”

So after a while the first man returned with 10 apples. The cheif then ordered him to stick all ten of them up his butt without making any expression at all on his face. He had a little bit of trouble with the first one and started crying while trying to put the next one in. He was soon killed.

Later, the next guy came in with 10 grapes. The cheif soon ordered him to do the same as the first guy. After to the 9th grape, the man started laughing so hard for no apperant reason, and was killed.

The first two guys soon met in heaven and the first guy ask the second, “Why did you start laughing? You only needed one more grape and you’d have gotten away!”

The second guy answered while still laughing, “I couldn’t help it. I saw the third guy walking in with pineapples.”

adopting???

OK, to answer your questions : First, the fees depend on the country. I can tell you first hand that international adoption is costly. The most inexpensive programs begin around $10,000. That is simply agency/country fees. You also must consider documents that must be authenticated, goverment forms, homestudy, etc. Most intn adoptions will run from […]

Written on Saturday, July 19th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

OK, to answer your questions :

First, the fees depend on the country. I can tell you first hand that international adoption is costly. The most inexpensive programs begin around $10,000. That is simply agency/country fees. You also must consider documents that must be authenticated, goverment forms, homestudy, etc. Most intn adoptions will run from $28,000 and up.

Most agencies will permit you to “choose” your baby, but…it’s not like you can send them a photo and say, I want a baby that looks like this. There are two ways to go about this. One, you can search photolistings and find “your” child and contact the agency that is listing the child. Two, you can sign with an agency and wait for a referral. You may refuse a referral but there are ususally stipulations in the contract as to exactly how many times you may refuse before they drop you. Be sure to check that before you sign.

Some countries have regulations as to how much you should make depending on how many people live in your household. However, it would first come down to the social worker doing your homestudy deciding if you could properly provide for the child and recommending you.

As for agencies, you’ll have to do your own research on that. Everyone will have their own opinions there. I suggest no mom-n-pop situation here. Go with a big name.

I suggest you get busy researching now. You should also consider domestic adoption as those kids need homes too. My situation simply made international adoption the way to go for my first child. My second will likely be a domestic adoption.

Good luck!

mac laptop or pc laptop?

Having used both, I found it easier and less expensive to go with the PC. I never considered the computer’s power as a determining factor - they are somewhat comparable. The user interface is the issue. In the past, when someone said graphic design, it meant a MAC was the best choice and probably still is. […]

Written on Friday, July 18th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

Having used both, I found it easier and less expensive to go with the PC.

I never considered the computer’s power as a determining factor - they are somewhat comparable. The user interface is the issue. In the past, when someone said graphic design, it meant a MAC was the best choice and probably still is. But the difference with a Windows computer and a MAC is slight now.

If you buy a MAC, you are held to a smaller base of compatible programs, whereas, Windows allows for the installation of other manufacturers’ Windows compatible programs.

So I woulod pick a PC with a minimum of 3GB RAM and a Core2 Duo. If you multi-task alot, consider a Quad processor… If you want to be a gamer too, choose a Core2 Duo with the fastest bus you can get.

what are some fundmental differences between LDS christians and other christians?

Here are a few fundamental differences… 1) LDS Christians believe that Jesus Christ is the literal Son of God. We also believe that we are literally children of our Father in Heaven. As we are all spirit children of God, we also believe that Jesus is our brother, and that we are all brothers […]

Written on Thursday, July 17th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

Here are a few fundamental differences…

1) LDS Christians believe that Jesus Christ is the literal Son of God. We also believe that we are literally children of our Father in Heaven. As we are all spirit children of God, we also believe that Jesus is our brother, and that we are all brothers and sisters.

2) LDS Christians believe in the same organization that existed in the early church, including a foundation of prophets and apostles. We believe that this organization was lost through persecution and apostasy, and later restored through a modern prophet.

3) LDS Christians do not limit themselves to a single book of scripture. We believe in the Bible, The Book of Mormon, and other scriptures. We believe that God continues to speak to man through prophets.

Did you know that is is impossible to be totally vegan?!?

I got best answer on this last time, but here is a different point of view concept. It is pretty much not possible to get something that is truly 100% pure. How’s that? Well there’s always micro-organisms, dust, debris, etc.. all around. Similarly there is always some extent of contamination or “microscopic” usage […]

Written on Wednesday, July 16th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

I got best answer on this last time, but here is a different point of view concept.

It is pretty much not possible to get something that is truly 100% pure. How’s that? Well there’s always micro-organisms, dust, debris, etc.. all around. Similarly there is always some extent of contamination or “microscopic” usage of certain compounds that get into most of the modern day items that are manufactured or processed.

For example, to make a computer hard drive requires a special clean room thousands and thousands of times cleaner than a hospital, not to mention any food manufacturing/processing facility where people are just wearing a hairnet or something. Occasionally some of their body debris gets on the food from skin or hair, etc… (which I suppose wouldn’t be vegan compounds), not to mention some of the uncleanly conditions of some facilities (I’ve seen people not clean their hands in the bathroom and go back to handling foods in the market, etc…). Other products may be processed on shared facilities and thereby come into contact with other compounds. So even if you get food products, the cleanliness of the facilities are not among the cleanest that are possible, so maybe you get 99.9% pure or maybe only 99% pure items, or perhaps 98.7% pure.

Most people have to live in the normal world so it is up to their own choice how they make their decisions.

What surfboard should I buy?

I have never been on a surfboard in my life, but I would apply the same things to buying one that I would if I were to buy myself a 12-speed bicycle. (1) Get one that will go the distance. (2) Be willing to spend the little bit extra and get yourself a really […]

Written on Tuesday, July 15th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

I have never been on a surfboard in my life, but I would apply the same things to buying one that I would if I were to buy myself a 12-speed bicycle. (1) Get one that will go the distance. (2) Be willing to spend the little bit extra and get yourself a really good one. (3) Get one that feels balanced to you. (4) If at all possible get one you can “test drive” before you buy it. (5) Consider seriously not buying it new. Are you sure you do not have a friend who would sell you one of his, and it would be a really, rerally good one, and it would be fitted to you, and work really well for you? (6) And while you’re at it, be sure you check out a second board in case this really good one develops problems after you’ve used it for two weeks, you can reach out your arm and grab that second one and - back in the water! Surf’s up!! Sent with good energies from Chris in South Portland, Maine, U.S.A. (I am 63 years old.)

Women, how often do you find yourself attracted to a man?

Honestly, I think you aren’t expecting too much. A woman should never lower her standards. But I do think that you might be holding men to this measure pretaining to your spouse. Please do not compare any of these men to him as this will never work. I do think that your attitude about meeting […]

Written on Monday, July 14th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

Honestly, I think you aren’t expecting too much. A woman should never lower her standards. But I do think that you might be holding men to this measure pretaining to your spouse. Please do not compare any of these men to him as this will never work. I do think that your attitude about meeting new people is all wrong. You see it as a chore and it is no wonder you dread dating. You are dating as a socially acceptable way to distract yourself. Have fun when you go out and enjoy yourself, stop trying to enjoy your dates. Don’t get me wrong, at your age there is a lot less “winners” to choose from than someone thats 25 but I am willing to bet that if you treat each date as an opportunity rather than a task, it will feel much less like work. Explore people, personalities, likes, dislikes, hobbies… not compatibility and probabilities. Good Luck

any ideas for a fake newspaper?

If you use Micosoft Word, it will take anything you write and divide it into several columns for you…and you can even justify the columns likea newspaper does. I have no idea what you want to make a fake newspaper for, but I’ll assume for a moment that it is simply as a practical joke. […]

Written on Sunday, July 13th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

If you use Micosoft Word, it will take anything you write and divide it into several columns for you…and you can even justify the columns likea newspaper does.

I have no idea what you want to make a fake newspaper for, but I’ll assume for a moment that it is simply as a practical joke. If that’s the case, then take a picture or two, scan the images in, and have a couple of black and white photos for a more convincing look.

Don’t forget to have some mundane, run-of-the-mill headlines for a more convincing look. Things like “State trooper suspended after high-speed chase…page nine.”

Finally, you might be able to pull this off better if you make it a “second” or “third” page of a fake newspaper rather than a front page, since front pages are so involved.

When you take a pap test, do they test you for everything? Other than std’s do they test u for hpv?

A pap will only test for abnormal cells. If you have HPV and it has actually caused the cells to change, then it will be picked up. Since many HPV infections do not cause this change, they are not detected through a pap alone. The form of HPV that causes warts […]

Written on Saturday, July 12th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

A pap will only test for abnormal cells. If you have HPV and it has actually caused the cells to change, then it will be picked up. Since many HPV infections do not cause this change, they are not detected through a pap alone. The form of HPV that causes warts is only detected visually and only if warts are present.

There are no other STDs that are detected through a pap. STD testing must be done by a specific blood test or culture. They are not part of you annual exam, and you must request them in addition to your pap. Most people assume that a normal pap means they do not have an STD, but that is not the case. Even if you request STD testing herpes will generally not be included in the test. You will need to request it be done.

If you are concerned, you should ask your doctor for a copy of your lab results. Then you can be sure that everything you wanted to have checked actually was.

i want my exhaust LOUD!!!!!!?

FLOW MASTERS WILL GIVE YOU A DEEP THROATY SOUND , IF YOU WANT IT REALLY LOUD GO WITH A GLASS PACK OR CHERRY BOMBS STRAIGHT PIPES 1991 Mercury Grand Marquis 4 Dr GS Sedan Dimensions : Exterior Length: 213.6 in. Width: 77.5 in. Height: 55.5 in. Wheel Base: 114.3 in. Curb Weight: 3836 lbs. Interior Front Head Room: […]

Written on Friday, July 11th, 2008 by chasewoodard :: 0 comments to this post

FLOW MASTERS WILL GIVE YOU A DEEP THROATY SOUND , IF YOU WANT IT REALLY LOUD GO WITH A GLASS PACK OR CHERRY BOMBS STRAIGHT PIPES

1991 Mercury Grand Marquis
4 Dr GS Sedan

Dimensions :
Exterior
Length: 213.6 in. Width: 77.5 in.
Height: 55.5 in. Wheel Base: 114.3 in.
Curb Weight: 3836 lbs.
Interior
Front Head Room: 38.3 in. Front Hip Room: 57.6 in.
Front Shoulder Room: 61.7 in. Rear Head Room: 37.2 in.
Rear Shoulder Room: 61.5 in. Rear Hip Room: 56.9 in.
Front Leg Room: 42.5 in. Rear Leg Room: 39.7 in.
Luggage Capacity: 21 cu. ft. Maximum Seating: 6

Performance Data
Performance
Base Number of Cylinders: 8 Base Engine Size: 5 liters
Base Engine Type: V8 Horsepower: 150 hp
Max Horsepower: 3200 rpm Torque: 270 ft-lbs.
Max Torque: 2000 rpm Drive Type: RWD
Turning Circle: 39.1 ft.

Fuel Data
Fuel
Fuel Tank Capacity: 18 gal.
EPA Mileage Estimates: (City/Highway)
Automatic: : 17 mpg / 24 mpg
Range in Miles: (City/Highway)
Automatic: 306 mi. / 432 mi.

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